Best Christmas Moment.

In case it's not clear, my girl's going to see Hannah Montana.

Christmas Memory #1057

The Year was 1991. I was excited for 1992 because I would be graduating from college. ROb and I had been dating a little over a year, and the topic of marriage had come up from time to time. One day we were talking about Christmas gifts and Rob said, "You'll know what it is the second you see it.". Well, of course, I knew it was going to be a ring. I told everyone I was getting engaged for Christmas. I told all of my friends, my family. Everyone. To confirm my suspicions, Rob had planned to make me a nice dinner at his house to exchange Christmas presents. What else could it possibly be?

Well, the day came and the dinner was lovely. It was time. Rob pulled out his Christmas gift to me, and sure enough, I knew exactly what it was the second I saw it. It was hairspray. 2 cans. Now, it was the expensive hairspray that I liked to use and could not always afford on my college budget, so it was a nice gift, it was just not a ring. The next day, everyone called to hear about my engagement and I told them I got...hairspray.

And, that is Christmas Memory #1057

Secret Confession

Have you seen this website?? It's pretty cool. www.postsecret.com. It's a on-going art project, it says, where people mail in their secrets on one side of a post-card. One of them today said, "I'm 22 and I'm incontinent." Big deal. Anyways, I thought I'd post my own little secret confessions right here.


** Sometimes, when no one else is in the car, I'll listen to Radio Disney...and sing along. Loudly.

** I need a little fabulous, is that so wrong?

** I'm still wearing maternity clothes.

** I'm 37 and incontinent.

** I have, on occassion, gone a whole month without changing my sheets.

** I've spent waaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy too much money this Christmas.

** If it were possible, I'd be wanting another baby already.

** I wanted to kiss the girl at the store who helped me find a pair of jeans that fit. The jeans even have a button and a zipper.

I feel much better now.

5 months old!

The big news here at our house is that at 5 months old, Hayleigh can sit!!
What a Big Girl :)




Since she can also roll and pivot around on the floor, she doesn't stay in one place long, unless she has something to look at. Someone left me a cute present under the tree!




Cute little baby!! There was a cuter picture of her, but it also showed my messy house. Wouldn't want any of you dear readers to have to see that!

Keeping Things Fair

WARNING: INCESSANT BRAGGING AHEAD! IF YOU DO NOT CARE TO HEAR ABOUT MY AMAZINGLY BRILLIANT CHILDREN, PLEASE READ NO FURTHER!

Ok, I got a call from Ryan's teacher yesterday. For a few short moments between her telling me who was on the phone and her telling me the reason for her call, I was thinking of all of the ways I was going to punish Ryan for whatever offense obviously precipitated this phone call. However, it was good news. Based on preliminary testing that was done on all 2nd and 4th graders, Ryan has qualified to be tested for the gifted program. This should make me happy, right? WRONG!

You see, Trisha and Jonathan are already in the gifted program (you were warned!) and if Ryan gets in, well that means that Jaden is the only one left out, and I feel badly about that. And, I don't know what to do about it. It certainly wouldn't be fair to Ryan to say that he can't have that chance because I'm afraid that it will hurt Jaden's feelings or make him feel bad about himself. I mean I could ask that Jaden be tested, he is on the borderline, but I doubt he'll get in. And, even if he did, he just doesn't have the organizational skills to handle the extra work.

We don't make a big deal about it. In fact, since Jaden is in a diffferent class from everyone else, it's not like it's regularly thrown in his face that the other kids are pulled out for special classes. When he has brought it up, we just bring up the fact that he has special skills that the other kids don't have, like being able to beat everyone in the family (besides Daddy) at arm wrestling.

I consider the fact that Jaden can even attend a regular school a true miracle. If the Spina Bifida weren't enough, he has had two near death experiences. Then, there's his shunt and the learning disabilities that are often associated with that, along with the motor planning and other issues that come with spina bifida. Add to that the fact that he has to work hard, I mean really hard, at things we take for granted, like walking or sharpening his pencil, or getting things out of his book bag. So, I think the level at which he learns is miraculous and I couldn't be prouder. I just know that he is going to be sad. I guess I need to remember that my job isn't to keep them from experiencing things that are sad, but to help them through the things that are sad, and to help them to see in them the things that I and God see in them.

Sometimes I forget that I have triplets

Sometimes I forget that I have triplets.

Oh, I know that I have plenty of school related projects that require my assistance and time. And, given that they are all in seperate class rooms, they all have seperate projects. And, I know that with sports and school things, my checkbook is always warm from being handled. And, I know that this time of the year, money is flying out of my bank account faster than you can say "Jiminy Christmas".

In times past, I couldn't leave the house without remembering that I had triplets. Three bald little baby heads travelling along in one gigantic stroller always got us lots of attention.
Stranger: "Oh are those triplets!"
Me: "Yes" (Here we go.....)
Stranger: "Three boys?"
Me: "No, the one with the dress and pink bow on her head is a girl."
Stranger: "Oh, do triplets run in your family?"
Me: "No."
Stranger: "Oh...you took fertility drugs then?"

But, now that they are older and soooooooooo different, it's more like they are three kids that are the same age rather than being triplets. Everyone at their school knows they are triplets and have gotten over the novelty of it. Since they are more self-sufficient, the logisitics of getting from point A to point B are much easier. It just feels like we are normal, whatever that means. It feels like our family is just like every other family.

Next year, for fifth grade, the triplets (I never even call them that anymore!) will be going to a new school. We'll have orientation. They'll be in three seperate classes, so I will have to try and split myself three ways. I'm betting then I'll remember I have triplets :)

Lots of Milestones

It was a big weekend for Hayleigh:

She found her feet and likes to play with them. She also like to be naked. Apparently this is soothing to her. Her brothers seem to think so also. Yesterday Trisha had a friend over all day and when she left, Jonathan and Ryan said "Finally!". I thought they were just sick of having a girl around. NOPE! They were sick of wearing clothes. Off came the shirts and pants. You don't want to stop by here unexpectedly!!



And, we had our first cereal. Trisha got to feed her and of course, Hayleigh is wearing her "I love my Big Sister" bib.



And then here she is rolling over. Actually, she's been doing that for about a month, but I just now got it on tape. Excuse me cheering for her. I'm loud, I know. Jonathan tells me this all of the time after his soccer games :)




She's also using the exersaucer now. Does this seem to be going fast to anyone else??

Black Friday

I did a little shopping yesterday. Several stores in my area were opening at 4am. I had to laugh at the JCPenney ad which said it was opening at 4am, except where prohibited by law. Evidentally, getting up at 4 am to go shopping is so obscene some places have outlawed it. I did not get up that early, but I did go before it was light out and I noticed while waiting in line at Toys R Us that there are a few different types of shoppers out early in the morning on Black Friday.

First, there's Jolly Joe. Joe is just loud and happy and who really knows why. Joe is always cracking some sort of stupid joke about how cold it is outside or how early it is while jingling change in his pocket. Joe even started whistling a little Christmas Carol while he's at it. I just smile and nod at Jolly Joe.

Then, there's the cranky grandma. I always seem to fall in line behind cranky Grandma. She complains that the line is too slow or that they need more workers or how her daughter had to go and have five kids and now she has to shop for them! Her life just sucks so bad, because not only is it Christmas, she has three birthdays to buy for too.

There's also Pete the Pervert. I don't really think that Pete is a pervert, it's just that he's only buying one gift, and well, who gets up at ungoldy hours just to buy one gift? Just to make sure no one really thinks he's a pervert, he's telling everyone who makes eye contact that the toy he has if for his nephew.

Then there is Molly Mom. Molly Mom has a Starbucks half the size of her head and a list half as long as she is. She is dressed so nicely for such an hour and her hair looks as id she actually combed it before she left. She has a plan and she is sticking to it. I'm hating Molly Mom, but it's only because I'm sort of envious of her.

Finally, there's Hurry-Up Henry. Hurry-Up Henry is literally running through the store to get what he needs. He runs to line and then tells his wife to wait there and pay while he goes to get the car. There is no time to waste for Hurry-Up Henry. He has many more stops to make before the sun comes up.

There's also me. But, I'm totally normal!

Grab youself a hunk of cheese...

...because here comes a whole lotta whine!

Ok, so I was cleaning out the closets this past weekend, when I came across THAT section in my closet. I'm sure you have THAT section also. It's clothes that used to fit me, but no longer do. I have kept them because they used to be sort of a reminder of what I once was and what I could once again achieve. I was most fond of this plum colored suit. The plum colored suit was in a size 10 and looked oh so good on me. Last time I wore that was before I got pg with Ryan. Which is sad. It has been 8 years since I've looked in a mirror and thought "Dang, Girl...you got it goin on!". 8 years. Now the suit is just depressing to me. It doesn't encourage me to do anything, except maybe emotionally eat over the fact that I used to be thin* and now I am not.

* Sidebar: I realize that to some people size 10 seems huge. In fact, I have a friend who has borrowed a lot of my size 10 clothes to be her post-pregnancy fat clothes. So, my skinny clothes are someone else's fat clothes...pathetic!!

Anyway, to continue whining, I never, ever, ever, thought I would ever weigh as much as I do. 40 extra pounds from Ryan, 20 from Hayleigh and there you have it. I told my fat rolls to go away but they seem to like it here. I suppose I could make myself feel better by thinking of all of the wonderful growth and positive character qualities I have obtained in these 8 years. From being more patient, to being able to multitask, to being less selfish, etc, etc. Right now, though, I'd give my left a** cheek to fit in that plum suit again...and, in fact, I'd have to.

Hand Turkeys

I'm sure you've seen these things. You know, when you put your hand on a piece of paper and trace your fingers to make the wings of a turkey. I have many, many, many of these in scrapbooks and safe places. They are neat because, if nothing else, they note the size of the kids' hands when they were such-and-such an age. Today I have received, from Ryan, a picture with a brand new twist on the hand turkey. Oh sure, there's the hand in the middle of the picture with the fingers brightly colored to represent feathers. And, then, well, there's a picture of a gun with brown bullets headed toward the turkey. Jaden says it's a very good drawing of a gun. I'm so proud :)

Oh yeah, I've got my s*** together!

As you can see, I've made lots of progress on my "profanity problem".

Here is a list of all of the things that I have forgotten lately, telling more and more people all over town, that I do, in fact, not have my s*** together:

Notes to school telling the teachers that someone is coming home with us or one of my kids is going somewhere. Three times in the past two weeks School Secretary has had to call me to see if I had forgotten a note. "Mrs. K, this is school secretary. Valerie has a note here that Trisha is supposed to come home with her." "Oh, yeah. Ha, ha, I forgot my note again, sorry." Big long sigh from school secretary.

Then, I got two collection notices today on medical bills. You know it's not that we don't have the money. We have plenty of money (by plenty, I mean NOT plenty). I just can't ever remember to pay the darn things.

Similarly, Ryan has a -$8.75 balance on his lunch card. Again, it's not that we don't have the money. It's that I don't have any checks. I keep forgetting to order them.

I've no-showed to 2, count them, 2 doctors appointments recently.

I totally skipped a therapy appointment. Jaden's physical therapy that is, not psycho-therapy for me, although, sure thanks, I'll take some.

Library books. These suckers were due in July. Nice. At least I know that I am personally building a wing of the new community library with my overdue fees.

I keep forgetting to buy dishwashing soap. I've been to the store four times for it. I buy lots of other things, but I still don't have the dishwasher soap. Side note: the huge piles of bubbles on my floor tells me that it is not a good idea to substitute liquid hand soap for dishwashing soap.

I'm sure there are more, but I can't remember what they are!

All of this irresponsibility is frustrating. ROb says I just have too many balls in the air. Yeah, well, that's what she said.

Aqua Dots

Another China recall. This one has a substance in it that metabolizes into the "date rape" drug. I do think China is trying to kill us by poisoning our toys. I will not buy anything made in China anymore. Which basically means, I won't be buying anything anymore.

Tales from my job

The following is an actual series of events that occurred at my job last week:

Brrrrring! Brrrring!
"Hello Dr. Dentist's Dental Office, how can I help you?"
"Hi there. This is Ms. Patient. I am trying to figure out how much money to put in my pretax account for next year and I think I am supposed to have a crown done, do you know how much that will be?"
I figure it out. "About $325 just to be safe.""OK. Thanks. Bye."

5 minutes later...

Brrrring! Brrrrrrring!
"Hello Dr. Dentist's Dental Office, how can I help you?"
"This is Ms. Patient again. Why do you sound like Alaina?" (A former hygienist).
"Oh. Do I?? That's funny."
"Yeah. Why do you sound like her?"
"Hmmm. I'm not sure, how can I help you?"
"Well, I forgot to ask if my husband needs to have any work done."
So I check. "The Doctor does not have any work indicated at this time."
"Seriously you sound like Alaina. Why do you sound like Alaina?"
"I guess we must have similar vocal cords. Is there anything else?"
"No. thank you. bye"

5 minutes later....

Brrrrring! Brrrrrrring!
"Hello Dr. Dentist's Dental Office, how may I help you?"
"This is Ms. Patient again. Do you know how many cavities I'll have this year?"
I laugh. Like ha-ha "It would be nice if we could predict that, huh?"
"No. I need to know how many cavities I am going to have next year. Me and my whole family."
"Well, there are lots of variables involved like genetics, oral hygiene, diet. It's really hard to predict."
"You have my chart, can't you just look at that and guess how many cavities I'll have."
"No, not really. I can't".
"Alaina would have."

hmmmmm.....

This is Halloween!

I have to say I love. love. love that we change our clocks back after Halloween now...I didn't have to worry once about anyone getting run over!!








The lady playing Dorothy is Miss Pop. She was Jaden's teacher last year.



I was Ryan's party mom, so I got to get this pic of him playing the toilet paper game.

Everyone loves a baby!

I had forgotten about this part. The part where everyone and their germ-infested brother wants to come up and breathe/touch your baby. And, Hayleigh, who is very, very social with her smiling and cooing and trying to sit up to see them better, just prolongs the contact. I think my favorite people have to be the ones who feel that they have to give advice. "It's chilly out, shouldn't she have a hat on?" Of course, I need to be light and love and represent Jesus, so I hold in what I really want to say and go for a Fantasy Island type script: "Smiles, everyone, smiles."

In addition to this, or perhaps, because of this I am developing what I like to call a "profanity problem". This is not good. Here are a few examples. Today, at Walmart when I was putting Hayleigh and her carseat into the shopping cart, I somehow managed to smash my boob in between the cart and the carseat. Don't ask. Suffice it to say, they're droopy. I actually needed to release the carseat in order to free my boob. This was painful and I muttered a short string of profanities. Of course someone was walking up beside their car and heard me. And, then there was the time a few days ago when I smashed my finger in Jaden's wheelchair. This time a loud string of profanities. If it wasn't bad enough that my children heard this, the front door was open and, since the bus stop is in our driveway, other people's children also got to hear this. So much for the light, love and representing! I'm going to work on my "profanity problem" and I'm going to work on walking faster through stores and not stopping to let people see my baby. That ought to work!

Trying something new

Due to the sheer volume of requests coming into my brain at one time, I will now have to install an automatic phone system for my children to use. I imagine it will go something like this:

"Thank you for calling Mom's brain, please listen carefully to the following menu options. Para espanol, esquedar numero uno. For help with homework, please press 2. To summon the taxi service, please press 3. For the chef, please press 4. If you'd like poop cleaned out from your diaper, please press 5. If you need help finding some lost item, please press 6. For money, please press 7. For more money, please hang up and try a different number. If this is a life threatening medical emergency please bypass the phone system by screaming really loud. All other callers please remain on the line until the next available brain cell can answer your call. Thank you."

The Wild, Wild World of Sports

I've been wanting to post for some time now about the crazy world of little league sports. The problem is: I'm not really sure what I want to say, I have so many mixed feelings regarding it. It used to be that I loved watching my boys play, win or lose. I loved watching them get better at skills and the pride on their faces as they achieved certain things. Sure, they would mess up and make mistakes, but that was part of it too and it was OK. But, as I sit at baseball games where grown men fight over where to put chalk lines, I can't help but wonder what we are even doing being involved. Rob even overheard two coached talking about parents who ask why their kid never gets to play such and such a position. The coach says, "I think to myself, your kid is never going to be a 1st baseman, so why should I put him in 1st base". He's talking about 7 & 8 year olds of course.

Ryan plays on a team that is undefeated. He will most likely win the championship this weekend without ever once losing a game. Great, right? The only problem is that the coach is so focused on winning, that Ryan isn't given a chance to try out new positions and he's so nervous up to bat, he can hardly hit the ball. I like Ryan's coach, really. But, I think it's so unfortunate. This is only his second season of ever playing baseball, and his confidence is shot. He doesn't even really look forward to going. And, inside my heart breaks for him. He's 7 years old for heaven's sake! Taking this thing too seriously is terrible. Listen, maybe 1 or 2 of these kids will get a baseball scholarship to college. Maybe. But, the self esteem blows to the others, who are told at 7, "you'll never be a first baseman" will last much, much longer.

Jonathan moved up to a travel soccer league this year. For the past several seasons, Jonathan has been one of the most valuable players on his in-house team and has gotten a lot of playing time. It has made him a better player. In travel, everyone is good, so he subs like everyone else. That was an adjustment for me, but it's OK now. Jonathan's team is 1-3-1. Probably not going to win any championships, but his coaches are committed to player development and realize that these kids are 10, and have lots of growth ahead of them. Jonathan's skills have improved alot. But, some parents wonder why we don't win more games and are starting to flap their gums a little bit about what should be done differently. Like Jonathan's coach said, "It shouldn't be that way [competitive to the point of leaving players behind], but parents want to win."

I don't know I guess I'd rather just have my boys learn some new skills, learn sportsmanship, have fun, make friends, learn to work as a team, learn to hang in there and work hard despite the score, learn to do your best, and then, maybe after all of that, win some games. I would rather have my son feel good about himself on a losing team, then feel stressed out on a winning team. I know I sound like a softie, afterall as men they will have to learn to compete and win in the business world, right? Maybe...but, I guess at 10 and 7, I'm leaning more toward letting them be boys, then making them be men. My sons are more than the sum total of their athletic abilities. I'll close with this poem:

He pulls on a helmet, picks up the bat,
and walks to the plate, "gotta hit and that's that."
The crowd starts to yell, the game's on the line,
last inning, two outs, the score's nine to nine.

Dad yells, "Go get it," Mom wrings her hands,
coach hollers, "hit it," but alone there he stands.

Heros are made in seconds such as this,
but he's just a little boy, what if he should miss?
Years after this game's ended and he's little no more,
will he remember the outcome or even the score?

No he'll have forgotten if he was out, hit, or a run,
he'll only look back on his friends and, hopefully, the fun.

So cheer this boy on, alone with his fate;
help him remember with fondness this stand at the plate.
And when the game's over, this boy can stand tall,
for you've helped him prepare to give it his all!

3 months old

Already...it's so sad!



Here she is showing us this new thing she found in her mouth.



Showing off her great neck strength.



Sucking her thumb. Yes, another one we'll have to get orthodontia for.



Smily Girl!



Just a cute, chubby little baby :)

She's smiling, laughing, squealing, cooing, sleeping through the night. Like Ryan said, "It's like she's finally growing some brains!"

McDonald's

I have two things I want to say about McDonald's:
1. Their iced coffee is very good. For about $2.25 you can get a huge cup of coffee that is actually pretty good. If you got that size of coffee at Starbucks, you would need a second mortgage on your home. Downside: It's 6 WW points :(.

2. Have you seen this thing about the McDonald's worker who was "forced" into taking off all of her clothes. Apparently, some man called claiming to be a police officer and told the manager to bring her into the office because some customers had filed a complaint that she had stolen from them. SO, to prove it, the manager had to have the girl take off all of her clothes. That is somewhat bizarre, but it didn't stop there. Throughout the course of several hours, the girl was "forced" to perform sex acts on herself and on the manager's fiance. This was all through the "direction" of some man on the phone claiming to be a police officer. Anyway, teh girl sued McDonald's of all things, and won $5 million.

I think two things about this. One is that this illustrates clearly to me why parents can not and should not in this day and age teach our children a blanket philosophy of obeying authority no matter what. It would be a much easier job if we could do that, but instead we have to teach them how to discern when to obey and when not. I find this to be much trickier. The other thing I think is that just when I think maybe, as a society, we are turning away from ridiculous lawsuits, this girls wins $5 million from McDonald's...please! BTW, when I say girl, I mean woman...she was 18. It's a bizarre, bizarre case.

Oh, and the other thing I think is that I wish Rob would stop walking around with a phone pretending like there is an officer on the other end wondering what I've done with someone's money!

What I'm thinking about today

Hannah Montana. If you do not know who this is, then you obviously don't have a tweenaged daughter. Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus is just about the biggest thing around if you are of a certain age, and it just so happens she is coming to my town right after Christmas. I remember that desperate time I once had, being in 8th grade when Michael Jackson came to town. We didn't or couldn't get tickets, I don't know. I can't even remember how many times I tried to be "Caller #12" into WDRQ. No luck. So, I decide that I will try my hardest to get tickets to this concert of a lifetime for my daughter. Except...

Except, that there happens to be a software company that sells software that makes it easy for scalpers to bypass the internet line and scoop up all the tickets. And, then these scalpers, after getting the tickets, sell them for an astronomical amount of money, and this seriously pisses me off.

I know there are grave atrocities that happen in this world. Babies are starving, left orphaned, forced into sex-slavery rings. I realize that this does not rank up there with that, but to purposefully buy up tickets and then sell them for over 5-6x the face value is wrong. They know they can do it because there will always be a silly parent willing to pay this amount of money to try and make their child's dream come true. I am seriously tempted myself. Town after town, concert after concert, this is what is happening. Anyone who does this simply does not have one shred of decency or morality in them...I'm sorry.

And, that's what I'm thinking about today.