Other possible titles for this post included: "Sleeping is for losers!" or "The Hormone Swing: Not just a thrill ride anymore!" or "Oh, my aching nipples"!.
I am finding life with a newborn, so far, to be a bit like a Dickens novel: it is the best of times and the worst of times.
It's the best of times because Hayleigh is just so sweet. I love looking at her perfect little fingers and toes and ears and her skin is so soft and she makes sweet little squeaking noises. SHe is starting to have some awake time where she is just looking around and absorbing the crazy environment around her. She is just so perfect...I am often just overwhelmed with her miniature perfection. I also love seeing the children interact with her. I knew Trisha would be great, but I have to admit how surprised I am by Ryan. He is totally protective of her and just so cute. One morning, he came into my room, checked on the baby, nodded his head, and walked out of the room without saying a word.
Of course, it's also the worst of times. Not getting any sleep, nursing until I feel like my breasts are going to fall off, feeling guilty for neglecting the other children because Hayleigh's needs are so consuming, etc, etc, etc. Last night, Hayleigh nursed for three hours straight! Three hours, people. Just let that sink in for awhile. I'm committed to breast feeding. It has many, many benefits for both of us, not to mention, I think it might be my ticket to losing some of this baby weight. So, committed in fact, that I've called several lactation consultants, doulas, medela dealers, etc. (read:perfect strangers) to talk about my breasts. It's a pride-sucking experience.
I know things will get better, we'll get into a routine. I know I'm going to blink and Hayleigh is going to be in college. I am trying to enjoy every moment I have with her...even if it is 2 in the morning!