Moyer the Destroyer

My Hayleigh. She sure is cute. And sweet. And cuddly. But don't let all of that fool you. No. Don't let the cute dancing and book-reading and babbling and waving and snuggling and giggling and playing fool you. It's simply a clever disguise. For underneathe all of that cuteness lies MOYER THE DESTROYER!

Moyer the Destroyer rips pages out of school books and colors on walls...all at the same time. Moyer the Destroyer can cleverly hide pieces of food in her mouth or in her hands and then, when you go to pick her up out of her chair, she can wipe them on your work clothes, your furniture, or your cat. Moyer loves the blinking blue light on my computer and has already twice, during this post alone, touched it to turn the computer off. Moyer can single-handedly, in a way that makes an 8-year-old jealous, throw toys and things all over a clean playroom floor in 2.4 seconds. Those socks I just put on her feet? In the toilet. The bow I just put in her hair? Stuffed between the heater vents.

Moyer is also very smart. She's crafty enough to know when the kids are getting ready to go to the busstop and waits patiently by the door. Once Ryan or Trisha or Jonathan leaves to go, out she runs right in her barefeet (it is 20 degrees and snowing here). How does she move faster than me? Clearly. Cleary, the only explanation is superhuman powers.

Oh, and don't try to tell Moyer no or pick her up and take her inside or remove her hands from the toilet water and clean them off. Whatever you do, don't do that. If you try, you will face the wrath of Moyer. And, Moyer is getting old enough where she expresses wrath. Oh, yes...she expresses wrath.

I've saved the best trick for last, though. Because despite all of this chaos, with the breaking of a smile or a little dance or a little word or with a little snuggle, Moyer can melt her mommy's heart in the blink of an eye.